1973, Ouachita River Arkadelphia, Arkansas: Three Motorists See Bigfoot In the Road

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1973, Ouachita River Arkadelphia, Arkansas: Three Motorists See Bigfoot In the Road

Around 8:30 PM, Carla Slowvan was driving along the Ouachita River. Tailgating her was a very impatient, Frank Hiller, the high school star quarterback, who was late to his youth group meeting.  Bringing up the rear, a safe two car lengths from Hiller’s back fender was Mildred Cacheck.

Cacheck saw the monster lurking in the middle of the road first and in a timely and responsible manner, applied her breaks.  Slowvan, distracted by Hiller’s headlights, which he kept flashing in her mirror, nearly hit the monster crouching near the yellow lane dividing line.  Hiller shouted a very nasty word, that would embarass his mother should she happen to read this, as he hit his breaks a second too late, thus rear ending Slowvan’s car.

In the chaos of the car accident, screeching tires, and errant horn honking, the Bigfoot, slowly, rose to its full 12 foot height.  Pinched between its massive fingers was a small blue flower that it had stooped down to retrieve from the middle of its, otherwise, quick road crossing pace.

When the police arrived on the scene of the accident, it was only the word of Mildred Cachekc that carried any weight.  For Cacheck was known through the area as a fine and cautious individual of high moral character.  While it was established that something was in the road, Hiller was still cited for failing to control his vehicle.  A ticket that was thrown out by Judge Don Debartlo, a high school football enthusiast.

1843, St. Lawrence River, New York: Wood Knocking Follows Wagons

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1843, St. Lawrence River, New York: Wood Knocking Follows Wagons

Jeb Hacker ran a wagon along the St. Lawrence River.  Usually, he would hire himself out for day trips of dry goods or maybe transporting a couple of passengers, though to be fair, his wagon had few amenities – let alone seats.

It had been a slow month along the river and Hacker was down to his last few cents, which he was saving in case the horse needed new shoes, which I probably the reason why Hacker agreed to take a young woman and her mistress up to Montreal, Canada.

It was a few day trip and he might lose money on the whole procedure, if the weather turned bad.  The first night after they set out, Hacker remained up to brush his horse.  That is when the whole woods around him seemed to pop to live with a terrific knocking sound.

First, Hacker thought it was gunfire, but the sound was not crisp enough and more organic sounding.  Maybe like rocks hit together or against fallen logs. While the knocking sounded very harsh and loud, it did not disturb the sleeping women.  Or if it did, they said nothing of it the next morning.

The following night, they were caught in a downpour and sheltered in the wagon.  When Hacker excused himself to make water, he heard the knocking sounds again.  This time louder and with much more violence.  It seemed to come from several directions at once.  If Hacker knew better he would have suspected they were surrounded.

Once they got to Montreal, Hacker inquired about the knocking with some other highway men in the local saloon.  They told him he had been very lucky.  Most people who heard those sorts of knocks, reported to have been attacked. The daylight attacks occurred the following day as stagecoaches and wagons were barraged by boulders and tree branches falling all around them as they made their way through the woods.

The locals claimed there was a family of Bigfoot who lived in the woods and did not take kindly to trespassers.

2012, Ogden Canyon, Utah: Man Claims He Found Bigfoot Fossil

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2012, Ogden Canyon, Utah:  Man Claims He Found Bigfoot Fossil

Doug Burton often goes to the hot springs in the middle of the night because he is a nudist.  When there are less people around, he can swim in the hot springs without his swimsuit on and not get into trouble.  Though, he admits there is always the risk of running into some high school kids partying in the area.  But it being Utah, there is not much worry about the party being too rowdy.

Burton claims that he encountered Bigfoot in the Canyon as well.  On several occasions, but few then ten, Burton actually caught a glimpse of the “gorilla like creature with a really large forehead and a severe overbite; totally covered in fur and smelling like an outhouse at the Boy Scout Camp.”

On this particular evening, the moon was very bright.  Such nights usually give Burton pause because he might be seen by any other late night passerby. So instead of taking his usual nude dip in the hot spring, he decided to walk around for awhile.

It was near the North East area that Burton claims his flip flop caught on the edge of a large oddly shaped object.  Too smooth to be a stone, Burton investigated.  With very little effort, he was able to dislodge the specimen.  As he dusted it off and picked some of the packed earth out of its ridges, Burton came to see that he was holding a fossilized skull.

Burton raced home to further clean and examine his find.  On the way, he dreamed off the cover of National Geographic and maybe a Jay Leno interview! He was going to be famous.  But when he got home and in the better light, Burton realized that what he discovered was much more shocking and frightening – he had stumbled upon a Bigfoot fossil!

While Burton will tell this story to everyone who will listen, he suspiciously refuses to show the fossil to anyone.

1976, Isle Royale National Park, Michigan: Bigfoot Peek A Boo

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1976, Isle Royale National Park, Michigan: Bigfoot Peak A Boo

Jennifer Payton wandered away from her families campsite to skip rock in Lake Superior.  Just as she approached the shore, she saw a large hairy man dart behind a tree.  Then the man peeked out and looked at her from behind the tree.  Unafraid, she ran toward the tree.

The hairy man darted toward another bigger tree.  Then did the same thing.  Peeking one eye out from behind it.  Jennifer was delighted by this game, since her brother never played with her, ever.  So she tore off toward the bigger tree.   The hairy man jumped up and then ran into some bushes.

He used his huge paws to part a little hole in the bushes and peek out at Jennifer.  Jennifer shouted, “I see you!” and raced toward the bushes.  The creature made a long squeaking noise then dove toward the Lake.

Jennifer saw the ripples where the hairy beast jumped in, but did not see her new friend again.

2002, Prentice Cooper State Forest, Tennessee: Bigfoot Seen and Heard

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2002, Prentice Cooper State Forest, Tennessee: Bigfoot Seen and Heard

Loren Wade-Wiley told this story:

“I was walking like I do everyday to keep these diabetic legs from freezing up on me.  You know how diabetics walk when they are doing their therapy?  Kicking one leg out all akimbo then stomping the foot down, hard and flat.  Makes a stomping sound is the only way I can think to describe it, at all.”

“Anyway, there I was, early in the morning, not so early that the sun wasn’t up, because it was and it was clear and bright that morning too.  So all those naysayers who call me a liar or think maybe I mistook a transient miscreant for a Bigfoot just should face up to the facts that I am not lying about what I saw next.”

“A Bigfoot.”

“Honest to Jesus!  I saw it standing right over in the woods not that far from where I was doing my diabetic leg therapies.  It was just standing there really.  Not doing anything on its own.  I think it was just as surprised to see me as I was to see it.  I say that because the next thing I can see is that Bigfoot let out a little welp, like a dog sometimes does in its sleep, you know that kind of noise? Or maybe you don’t keep dogs.”

“So it makes this little welp, then hops up on its toes, turns and runs off in the opposite direction.  Even though it was gone, I was certain of that fact, I did not finish my diabetic leg therapies that morning.  Instead, I took myself right to McDonalds and got a milk shake to calm my nerves.”

1978, Vernon County, Wisconsin: Bigfoot Interrupts the Family BBQ

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1978, Vernon County, Wisconsin: Bigfoot Interrupts the Family BBQ

Sam Upgrave was cooking out with his family.  They had taken their plates into the kitchen, abandoning the condiments and a bowl of chips on the picnic table on their backyard deck.  The wind had picked up and it started to rain.

Just as the family was sitting down to enjoy their hamburgers and grilled bratwursts, Emily Upgrave let out an ear splitting screech.  She pointed to the deck as tears ran down her face.  Sam and his wife turned around to see what scared their youngest child.

“It was some kind of apeman,” Cheryl Upgrave told us, “bigger than any basketball player on Timothy’s high school squad and darker than a black bear!”

“But it was just as hairy,” Sam chimed in, “I mean let’s call it what it was, a Bigfoot.  Though they way it grabbed that bowl of chips, I might call him Bigpaws, too.”

“Little Emily’s scream frightened the beast.  I know because when it looked up, it looked right at me.  I could see the fear in its red eyes.  It knew it had exposed itself to unreasonable danger coming up on the deck.”

“Now, now, Cheryl, there is no way you can say that for sure,” Sam cooed.

“Yes, I can,” she replied flatly, “a mother knows that look and it was the same look that Bigfoot gave me.”

1963, Tenmile River, Oregon: Couple Hits A Bigfoot Collects Hair Sample

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1963, Tenmile River, Oregon: Couple Hits A Bigfoot Collects Hair Sample

Janice and Theo Klopper were tooling around in their new Chevy.  They drove up and down the Lockwood Road, just going to the dead end and back, really getting to know their exciting new purchase.  Their own car.  Imagine that!

Just as they had made the U turn for the third time, they see a dark figure crouching in the middle of their path.  Theo attempts to swerve out of the way, but clips the creature as it leaps up and out of the way.  The Chevy careened slightly to the left as the 12 foot hairy manbeast leaped right.

There was a terrifying scream with a resounding thump.  Janice was screeching in horror.  Somewhat out of panic and self-preservation, Theo gunned it toward home.  He ran every stop sign and disobeyed most of the traffic laws he so carefully studied.

Once they were back, in the safety of their garage, Janice bolted inside and locked herself in the upstairs bathroom.  She remained there sobbing for two hours.  Theo took stock of the damage to his new automobile.  While the dent was substantial but there was stuck to one of the crumpled edges of metal was a patch of hair.  Theo collected the hair, worried that he might have hit and run a hobo.  He sealed the hair in a little plastic bag and kept it.

Years later, Janice would find the hair and accuse Theo of cheating on her.

1952, Lake Eucha, Oklahoma: Bigfoot Displaced by Spavinaw Creek Dam

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1952, Lake Eucha, Oklahoma: Bigfoot Displaced by Spavinaw Creek Dam

In 1952, Spavinaw Creek was dammed creating Lake Eucha. While the Cherokee were warned that their town was going to be submerged, the Bigfoot Colony that lived around the creek, did not.

The week the dam went live and the lake was created, the Cherokee witnessed a very angry Bigfoot Migration.  It included smashed car wind shields, crushed trash bins, and a rash of endlessly barking dogs.  Several of the tribal elders, recounted when they first put in the electricity to the town.  A similar Bigfoot event happened as the night grew brighter.

Where the Bigfoot went remains undetermined.  But they never did return to the Eucha area.

2001, Paint Township, Pennsylvania: Bruce Wineberger Calls 911 on Bigfoot

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2001, Paint Township, Pennsylvania: Bruce Wineberger Calls 911 on Bigfoot

Bruce Wineberger was well known to Paint Township sheriff’s dispatchers.  Mr. Weinberger called 911 once or twice a week to report that a Bigfoot was in his yard kicking over the flower garden.  Or to report that Bigfoot was tramping mud all over the house and making a general trespass of his property.

Today was the last time Mr. Wineberger called 911.  He called to report that a Bigfoot was in his garage throwing all his yard tools into the street.  When asked to describe the Bigfoot, Mr. Wineberger said “I dunno. He is maybe 12 foot tall, covered in hair, and smells like a fishy sewer.  Just get a police cruiser over here before he eats any more of my leftovers!”

The police did arrive about a half an hour later to find Mr. Wineberger sitting in a lawn chair in his front yard, drinking a can of beer, dressed only in his underwear.  He was defiant and argumentative upon questioning.

1949, Adler Creek, Sandy, Oregon: Charles McBride Witnesses a Bigfoot Funeral

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1949, Adler Creek, Sandy, Oregon: Charles McBride Witnesses a Bigfoot Funeral

While fishing, Charles McBride saw a group of what looked like three bears walking upright move through the forest.  Leaving his kit behind, McBride followed the bear creatures.

After several stops, where the creatures leaned against trees and appeared to weep, the procession stopped at a particularally shallow spot in the river.  The three creatures waded into the Creek.  McBride, then, saw that two of the creatures were carrying a fourth creature.

Two of the Bigfoot washed their dead friend in the creek, smoothing out its fur.  Meanwhile, the third started digging a deep hole with his massive hands.  The three gently lowered the body of their friend into the grave and howled together.  McBride thought he heard a sad melody to the beast’s dirge.

All three Bigfoot filled in the hole.  The smallest of the three gathered up some smooth stones and little rocks, which were carefully arranged on the grave.  Once this ritual was completed, all three Bigfoot ran off in different directions.

Later when McBride tried to return to the grave site, he could not find the rocks nor any evidence of recent digging.  As a result, his story remains widely dismissed as the fantasy of a sun drunk fisherman.